“36th Street Is Hood To The Core, Duh”

I don’t know how much more Dirty Duh Productions could live up to their name. It’s almost frightening.

If that’s the only name you can come up with, I can only imagine what would be in store for a show booked through them. Turns out, exactly as I imagined.

Come showtime Saturday night, the 36th Street Lounge, Dirty Duh Productions, and Hood Core all dropped the ball. Big time. Between a massive lack of communication, no sound system, from what I can tell hardly any promo, no pay, no drinks, and absent organizers, it looks one big pile of fuck for whatever band decided to stay for this garbage example of professionalism. Oh yea, that’s right. Only two did. Bravo for having the patience for such idiocy. One band decided to no-call/no-show that shit (Chip Fundy…wtf kind of name is that?). Eye Remain skedaddled before a single song was ever played. Shame on you both, get a tin can on a string if you can’t call ahead or get a pencil and paper if for some reason your mouthholes are too broken to tell anyone you’re ditching.

That’s two of the dumbest fucking things to do at a show I can think of. What’s the goddamn point of booking if you’re just going to completely bail or show up for 5 seconds and leave? If you wanted to waste your own time and gas, you should have just drove the van off a damn cliff for a while.

Hood Core, if your bands are on the bill at least have one person there to help out. Otherwise, they are just bands there on their own time and dime. Also, that name is just…ugh, nevermind.

As for DD and 36th Street, either stay out of the game or straighten the fuck up. Shit like what happened Saturday night is about the worst example of a Michigan metal scene at work and you should be entirely ashamed of yourselves for being too incompetent to know better. I could have had a better show in my bathroom from what I’m being told of the mockery you tried to pull off. Don’t have cash to pay the bands? Then don’t twist their nipples about it and tell them that up front. At least offer them a few beers! Oh wait, someone did until you went all McDuck and pulled that offer out of their hands. Real classy move there.

Better yet, if you don’t have a fucking sound system, then don’t have motherfucking shows! How hard is that to figure out?

My best idea yet. When you fuck up, don’t blame anyone but yourselves.

Then don’t repeat your mistakes.


Bringing The Family Back: Metal Doc Brown Speaks


Okay, so you’re probably all wondering what the hell this is about, as I’m sure you’ve seen it floating around Facebook. Here is the info: 

Metal Doc Brown is going to be hitting the road for some upcoming weekend speaking events. We’re going to be speaking about our experiences in the metal community, how we feel we can unite everyone and stop the bullshit that has been going on, Q&A, sharing some personal anecdotes, and generally having a fucking great time. We’ll have a merch booth set up where you can come meet us and harass us as much as you’d like. We’ll also be doing giveaways, contests, and all kinds of other crazy shit. We’re going to have bands playing and possibly other guest speakers depending on the date. We promise you’ll have a fucking blast. Email us if you’d like to host an event!

Band of the Day- Kill Tomorrow

Last weekend I was a judge at the Heavyweights in Grand Rapids, which was hosted at the Intersection. (They were amazingly friendly and made me feel right at home)

I’d listened to Kill Tomorrow’s recordings on their Facebook page several times and wasn’t really that into it. It wasn’t bad but I just couldn’t jam it. Then I saw them live.

These dudes owned that fucking stage. They had amazing stage presence and played a great set. There are videos out there to prove it. http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=X-PLNhiZw5k

They have made a fan of me and hopefully these dudes will be headed out my way more often to play the Lansing and Flint areas. They had quite a few fans from Muskegon out to support them and I’m betting money they could make quite a few out here.

“Let’s Cuddle and Talk About Our Feelings.” by Metal Doc Brown

We are a very strange and diverse group of individuals. Some of us are covered in tattoos, piercings, scarification, implants, etc. Some of us look are not. Some of us have some of those things, but not all.

I used some way too much right there, I’m well aware of it.

My point is that not all of us can have the same taste in appearances, just like not all of us can have the same taste in musical preference. Thrash, Death, Grind, Hardcore, Rock, Nu, etc.

I really don’t care what people think of the music that I like. I used to have a complex about people telling me that a band wasn’t cool. I’d feel uncool for liking them. These days, I really could not care less. I still love Slipknot. I will jam Limp Bizkit every now and then just to hear “Rollin.’” I love Maroon 5, NWA, The Offspring, Digital Underground, Job For A Cowboy, Coheed & Cambria, It Dies Today, Nodes of Ranvier, the list could go on and on.

I’m just saying that we all need to stop worrying about what everyone else thinks about our musical preferences.

Topic two: If you don’t know anything about metal or rock, don’t try to have a conversation and pretend that you’re a fucking genius. It makes you look stupid because those of us who DO know what we’re talking about just think you’re a jackass. If you want to know something, fucking ask, don’t blabber your mouth and try to talk out of your ass until you make everyone want to punch you in the face.

I get that not everyone can be a walking dictionary of metal, but the next time I hear someone complaining that Meshuggah is ripping off Periphery and Veil of Maya, I’m going to choke them to death with my bare hands. At least know your fucking roots, people.

Band of the Day- Flood The Desert by Metal Doc Brown

I saw a band perform a few weeks back that blew my mind.

I saw them again last night at the Heavyweights. They didn’t win, but with Second place, Flood The Desert has definitely turned some heads. The crowd even chanted their fucking name. A LOCAL band had people chanting their names.

Flood The Desert is, I imagine, what the illegitimate offspring of Mastodon and Rush would sound like. These dudes are insane. A three piece with the sound of a much larger band and way more interesting music than most local bands, these guys are original, innovative, and extremely entertaining.

I’d keep my eye on these guys if I were you, because they ARE going places.


“You’ve Probably Never Heard of It.” by Metal Doc Brown (Justin)

Let’s be honest, we’ve said a lot of shitty things here at MDB. You’ve all said some shitty things.

But you know what?

We don’t give a fuck. We’ve never sugar coated shit and we aren’t going to start anytime soon, so if we aren’t your flavor of Kool-Aid, keep shopping. I hear Jim Jones makes a killer batch of the stuff.

We aren’t bad people. Ask anyone who knows us, we really do care about the scene and try to make it to shows as often as we can. I just drove to Grand Rapids from Mt. Pleasant four separate times to judge the Heavyweights 2012 with no payment. I didn’t expect to paid, fuck, I didn’t want to get paid. I met a ton of cool-ass people and that’s worth it to me..I could have been trying to convince people to buy MDB shirts and make money off of them. You know what I was doing? I was plugging every band I could think of to everyone I talked to and tried to network, you know, what you guys should be doing but usually don’t do. Talking to people is THE BEST method of promotion you have and most of the time you’ll just stand around talking to each other about how you wish there were more people at your show

Bands, another thing I think you should look into, even though it sounds stupid: Business cards. Seriously, people hang on to those damn things and will file it away for a later date.  Plus, venues will know that you’re serious about your shit if you take the time to actually buy professional business cards. I’m not saying you WILL be serious if you buy them, I’m saying it will at least give you the appearance of seriousness. Yes, I did just advocate the use of business cards to try to fool people into booking you. Why?

Because it fucking works.

Article up.

Pants Down.


“Hilldale” by Marty McFly

I rarely write articles anymore so I figured it was time I bust out a new one. Today’s topic: GROWTH. Over the past year we have been consistently calling out, and grilling any band, or person who has tried fucking up our Michigan scene. We have been doing this in order to try to bring back the family that once was. In the last year here has been many arguments, lots of hatred, and hell even a few death threats but I am proud to say that our scene has grown exponentially.. More kids are coming to shows, more good tours are coming to our fine state, and many up and coming bands are actually putting in work to become successful. Yes there are still a few bands with egos, yes some kids are just fucking idiots and will never learn, but the majority has really starting to mature and it is something I really enjoy seeing. I am proud to see many bands in all different realms of metal starting to be recognized for the hard work. So for anyone hating on us for calling people out, and stirring the pot, remember we are being negative in order for the positive to come out!